Mom Jeans

Am I the only person in the world who didn't know about this concept?  I came across the term in a novel and went straight out and polled my friends.  Yes,  they'd heard about it, and what planet was I on?

Oprah helped me out.  She has a online article that describes all the characteristics of Mom Jeans so you can decide if you're wearing them and then do something about it.  I'm not sure what.

Note the "heart-shaped butt"

A high waist is the diagnostic of Mom Jeans.  It accentuates the "flat curvature of 40+ buttocks, resulting in the characteristic upside-down heart-shaped butt."  Note  the  baggy thighs tapering to a narrow ankle,  plus the tucked-in shirt  Add a thin belt to this get-up, and you're in Mom Jean Land, for sure.

Definitely Mom Jeans:  The Ice Cream Cone

But be careful if  you try to escape Mom Jeans, because there are all kinds of pitfalls.   If  you wear boot cut jeans, especially if you're under 5'4", you can end up with thighs hugged too snugly.  And, sadly, stretch denim can be no-no, because it can give you "dimples below the tush."  (But it's so comfortable!)   Distressed denim can highlight problems like thighs, butt, and hips.  (What's left?  Ankles?)

The Dimpled Tush that can result from stretch denim

And, however obvious this solution to Mom Jeans, do not rush out and buy jeans with a low-cut waist because that could result in a "muffin top" spillage over the top. (Shoot me!)

I ran all this by my sister at lunch yesterday.  She's a designer and always looks sleek and pulled together.  She wears boot cut jeans, but she's quite tall, so that's okay.  Her jeans come from The Gap, FYI.  She says that jeans are good for only one wearing because they stretch out and become too baggy in the butt.  You have to spray the butt with water and throw the jeans in the dryer to get another day's wear out of them.  Unless you want, as Oprah's expert puts it, "your backside sagging like a day-old diaper." 

A friend who works with a lot of young women thinks it's hilarious that I didn't know about Mom Jeans.

"We're old," she said.  "So what?"

How about the brand, "Not Your Daughter's Jeans?"  I said.  I have several pairs of those.  And I never tuck in my tops.

She shook her head.